When did you last see someone? How did you make them feel seen?

Don’t worry – I’m not trying to pry into your love affairs or get your eyesight checked.

Let me tell you a story: a story involving a pile of paper, hours of writing, and staying up until 4 in the morning.

What? No – this isn’t about procrastination and school work! (We’ll talk about that at a different time.)

Turn your eyes to my white desk, over that stack of paper – they’re cards. Sturdy, white cards, each with a different marbled oil paint design on the front.

They’re thank-you cards.

My hand is flying across the surface of one of them, leaving trails of cursive purple writing wherever it touches the surface.

It all ends with a rapid, signature-signing swish. Closing the card, I treat it like gold leaf as I slide it into an envelope, write a name on the front, and attach to it the very pen I used to write it.

If you manage to look away from your phone (believe me, I know it’s not the most entertaining thing to watch) you can see as that envelop joins a pile to my right of almost a dozen cards, each with its own purple pen attached.

There’s not a sight you see every day (or night).

What am I writing? Why am I awake at 4am?

Glance over these envelopes. Is it just you, or are most of the names on the front prefaced with “Mr.” or “Ms.”?

It dawns on you.

These are for my teachers.

What’s so special about these? Why would a teenager stay up ‘till light begins to return over the horizon to write them?

Take one. Open it. Read.

Dear Ms. B,

Working alongside you has been a beautiful experience.

Together we’ve butted heads, then put them together to weave new ideas. Together we’ve had our head-on collisions with the IB, but we’ve made it out on top. Together, we’ve shared a unique experience between student-teacher and peer-peer that only the creative freedom of art can inspire.

I’ll always remember how you challenged me to build off of my ideas, to become more concise in my writing and to use art to explore my deepest self. I am a better man because of your sponsoring and your critical feedback. I’ll never forget your enthusiasm, your noble pride, and your generosity.

May this card serve as a memory for the times we’ve shared, and may this pen of purple – a colour of beauty and power – remind you of the positive, lasting influence you have on all your students, past, present and future.

Robert Vilkelis, May 30th, 2016

Gratitude

How did that letter make you feel?

Gracious? Confused? Happy? Shocked? Tearful?

That’s the power of seeing someone.

We go through life every day looking at the people around us, but it is rare that we actually see them.

What does it mean to see someone?

Seeing someone is acknowledging them at their deepest level of being: it is appreciating them for what they do, acknowledging them for what they’re capable of, and, above all, it is recognising them for who they are.

The cards you saw on my desk? They were how I saw my teachers: people who do so much, sacrifice so much, and dedicate so much time to our lives, growth and development – even if we don’t always see that. Those purple pens clipped to each card? Those are personal tokens – mementos – of who I am and what I do that they can use every day to remember who they helped me become.

Only 8 of those cards went to my teachers, though.

Who did the other 4 of the dozen go to?

Pete, the school’s loyal handyman, Mirco, a generous grounds keeper, and Gina and Ann, high school’s compassionate secretaries.

Why? Because those who aren’t used to being seen are the ones who deserve be seen the most.

The days after I secretly delivered these cards to my recipients’ desks, they came to me over time to tell me how much my words meant to them.

I made all of them smile.

I made my Italian teacher cry.

Pete took me to the side to tell me “this is the best card I’ve ever gotten”.

The most valuable aspect of gratitude, though? It comes back to you, tenfold.

The hours of sleep I missed writing those cards are negligible compared to the mutual joy I felt thinking of how much each hand-made, hand-written, hand-delivered card meant to them.

I may be graduated from high school now, but as I look forward, I will never forget the role these teachers, maintenance, and administrative staff played in making me the man I am today.

You’ve taken out time in the day to read my reflections, and in doing so, you’ve seen me. Thank you.

I see you.